Is Humanity Against Michelle Obama’s Arms?

Did that title spark your attention? Then chances are you already know where this is going.

I’m talking about Cards Against Humanity, which might be the college card game. It’s crude, hilarious and meant to be played with friends.

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In my three years at school, I never got around to playing this game. Only one of my friends had it, and I was never available when he wanted to play.

A few weeks ago I went to hang out with Stephanie, a friend I’ve known since grade school. After catching up over her homemade egg rolls (check out her recipe and marvel at the gorgeous photographs here: we sat down with a few of her co-workers and friends to play Cards Against Humanity.

I was a little worried at first, considering I know how sexual this game can get. And it didn’t help that I only knew Stephanie and her sister — the other four guests were strangers to me. Luckily, I have played Apples to Apples before, so understanding how the game is played wasn’t a problem.

In case you don’t know: Everyone is dealt seven white cards with “answers” printed on them. One by one, each person takes a turn drawing a black “question” card. The other players each put one white card in the pile in response to that question. The individual who pulled that question then selects one answer card as the winner. The winner gets the black card, and the player with the most black cards wins. 

When it’s your turn in Apples to Apples, you usually pick the (red, noun) card that most fits the (green, adjective) description. But in Cards Against Humanity, there are no straight rules for choosing a card. 

Some people select the card they find the most funny, others pick the one that’s most out-of-the-box. This is why it’s more enjoyable to play with people you know.

Admittedly, I didn’t understand some of Stephanie’s friends’ senses of humor. Earlier in the evening, they had been discussing the new Guardians of the Galaxy movie and comic books, a conversation I just couldn’t contribute to.

It didn’t help that I’m not caught up on my lingo and pop culture, either. (Skeletor? What is that?) But the more rounds we played and the better I got to know everyone, the more fun the game became.

In my hand, I almost always had a variety of people, things and actions. Here’s one I snapped a photo of.

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One of my favorite question cards came when I drew “When I am a billionaire, I should erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate _______” although I didn’t quite have the same liking for every response I got to that question.

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I don’t remember which I ended up choosing, but I bet it was between “A bitch slap” and “Lunchables.”

Probably THE best card I drew was “Five-Dollar Footlongs” which made me howl in laughter because the Subway commercial has turned into a huge inside joke with a friend on my high school track team.

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At the end of the night, when we all counted up how many black cards we had earned, I was surprised that I had the most (15!). While I did earn quite a few, I didn’t think I won more than the other players.

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I won by one card, making it a close win, but a win nonetheless; some would call that beginner’s luck, but I’d like to think Humanity was just on my side (and perhaps explains why Humanity may be against a certain First Lady’s arms).


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